I was chilling, listening to music and sunbathing and I started thinking.
There`s been a feeling I`ve had for the past 2 weeks pretty much which I wasn`t really able to “define”, a really good feeling tho.
Two weeks ago is when I came back from my Camino across Spain, useless to say I came back a bit different, I tried to describe the feeling but with not much results; at first I thought optimistic but not really cause to me being optimistic is believing things will be good, life is going to be nice and that`s not enough. After I thought confident which is really close to the truth but it`s still not the perfect description.
I found a couple of post a friend of mine wrote and I found a particular one he wrote when he moved to London which is basically when I met him and he talks about his choice, how hard it was and all the consequences. Having done the same I can tell how scary it is but he went on saying how much he felt really alive for the first time.
There`s an italian way of saying which he used and it just fit perfectly for what am I feeling, he said he finally was holding the reins of his life, he was the one taking the decisions.
That`s exactly how I`m feeling, I finally have a grip on those reins. We can say that in the end I`m also confident in myself, I know that even if it`s gonna take a while if I make up my mind I`ll just work towards that decision till I make it real.
I know, whatever decision I take, whatever “bad things” may happen won`t break me, I`m gonna make it no matter what.
Like before I`m still not sure about life, still no idea what am I gonna do but it doesn`t matter cause I`m gonna plan it little by little until I figure it out and it`s gonna work.
The title of the post is the title of a song by Biffy Clyro which is the one that really triggered it and a certain point it goes “I am the mountain, I am the sea and you can`t take that away from me”. I`m me, with all my flaws and imperfections but that shouldn`t stop me, no one is perfect . My newly found self confidence and hope, no one is gonna be able to take it away, no one is gonna change me.